I don’t think my poor husband knew what was happening!
One minute I would be loving and kind ….and then the next ….I would be the bitch from hell.
Let’s face it….everything can change during perimenopause and menopause. Relationships change, marriages fall apart, and it can be a really crazy, unpredictable time. Over 60% of divorces are initiated by women in their 40s, 50s and 60s according to a recent survey conducted by AARP Magazine.
Experts say that the number one reason for divorce is the lack of communication. It may be difficult for a woman to even want to communicate when she is dealing with hormone imbalance, lack of sleep, health issues and stress. How do you even start a conversation about what is going on when feeling like crap? As much as it can be difficult, it is crucial!
Partners of women going through these changes often don’t know what’s going on. They may think they’ve done something wrong or are to blame in some way. It can be very unsettling and confusing for them.
This uncharted territory can test the best of relationships….but it can bring them closer if they are willing to open up.
Once a woman understands what is happening to her, it is really important that she communicates this with her partner. How is he supposed to know what is happening if he is not told? An honest open conversation (and possibly many of them) is required.
When communicating it is important that the woman takes full responsibility for her own feelings, owns them and in no way blame her partner. She could open up the conversation with something like….
‘Darling, I need to let you know what is going on for me. I am having menopausal symptoms of _____________ and ____________ (fill in the blanks) and as a consequence I am feeling ___________________ (again, fill in the blanks – irritated, angry, tired, frustrated etc). It is not anything you are doing and I am sorry if I snap at you at times (or whatever behaviour you are displaying). I am finding this change quite challenging and I really want you to be patient with me. I don’t need you to fix me, I just need for you to listen to me and be patient.’
So now you get the idea.
All the best to you for your own open conversations.
So I hope this helps you.
So….I’d love to catch up and learn more about how you are coping with menopause.
You can book with me for a no obligation quick chat.